In the first year of being a Mom, I was so focused on our Daughter, our home and my Husband that I started to lose myself. I was tired, I felt like a completely different person and even though I loved being a Mom and having a child. I was not happy. About ten months into Motherhood, I started crashing. After doing some exploration on the internet, finding ways to help myself, my mood and figuring out if I was suffering from other mental issues, such as depression. One article made me realised, I had not been taking care of myself.
As a Mom you are first in your family. You support, love, care, organize, pretty much almost do everything. Having others put you first is not going to bring you the life satisfaction you are wanting. You NEED to put yourself FIRST.
What am I getting at here? You need to still do the things you love. Go out shopping with girlfriends, or grab a drink. Go workout or take a mini weekend holiday. Do things away from your family, so you can be by yourself, with yourself to give you the opportunity to focus on YOU.
I was not doing this the first year of being a Mom. I was so focused on everyone else, that I put myself on the back burner. And let myself get dry and stale. Sounds horrible, but truthfully it was. I didn’t realise how terrible it was until I actually took the initiative to put myself first. When I started to become happy with myself again, I realised that you as a Mom don’t need to be put at the bottom.
You need to be put FIRST. You will be no good for anyone if you aren’t happy. So go out and still do the things you love. Nervous about leaving the baby? Trust me when I tell you, the baby will be OK. You have a huge to-do list of chores. Forget about it! Folding clothes can wait, and trust me again when I say. Five years from now you won’t remember the basket of clothes that you folded. You will remember how unhappy you were with yourself and life. You don’t have time? A common phrase I’m pretty sure I said everyday. You have to MAKE the time. Buy a planner and actually schedule your “me” time. Sounds crazy, but you are more likely to achieve the time you want if it is planned around your family life.
Being a first time Mom is magical. But it can also burn you if you don’t do what’s best for you. And that is why I wrote this post. It took me ten months to realise that I am just as important as my children, my home and Husband. And I am no good to any of them if I am not taking care of myself. And YES, it is ok to put yourself first. Don’t feel selfish, because it is best for your whole family. When you’re at your best, your family life and happiness will be what you’ve always wanted. I want every women, soon to be Mom or Mother to know the importance of putting yourself first.
Thanks for reading,
Jaclyn Yvonne
Jaclyn Yvonne 